Chapter 14: The Revolutionaries' Change of Heart & Salvation of a Horse (Usha Bahenji's Birth Anniversary: 30th July,2026)

 

Shri Madhavacharya's Philosphy of Shudh Dwait or Pure Dualism

In the theory of dualism happiness is linked with sorrow and the forces of good and evil are balanced in this mundane world. Where hope and longing are harbingers of joy, adverse conditions do not seem delightful.In case everyone becomes modest, wealthy and noble, the entire play of the world's creator would be futile.

Violence & Nonviolence

Violence and non-violence are two ends of a constant cycle according to the principle of evolution. Those who are vulnerable and unknowingly head towards evil, repent on becoming conscious of this fact(Most people are of this disposition.)

Shri Usha Bahenji's Loving Tenderness

Elders believing in highly restrictive conventional norms, the youth influenced by modern perspectives, spirited boys stepping into adolescence, young children and even infants were irresistibly drawn towards Usha Bahen ji's magnetic persona. Each felt that Bobo's affection was reserved exclusively for him. Usha Bahen ji distributed Krishna's loving tenderness with a generous hand. Eminent men would certainly be impressed by her simplicity, sentimentality, good-hearted, calm and compassionate nature, which exuded a sense of affinity.

Lord Vishnu Resides in our Heart

Once a learned brahman of the Sanatan Dharam Mandir in Ambala Cantonment saw her horoscope and foretold, "Lali! Society will throng to you even if you are secluded in a forest." 

Having implicit belief in Radha-Krishna and completely relying on them-she expressed the in-dwelling Vishnu by ecstatic and evocative expressions of love towards all.

She strongly advocated non-violence but during her tenure as a principal she had to punish children. Thrashing was not in her nature and she would make them stand up at times. 

On doing so, she would entreat," God,I have taken this step merely for proper functioning of the school and the student's improvement." On some pretext she continued to stand for that time span.

A Donkey Blocked Their Way

Her gentle disposition was apparent in every act. Once while journeying a donkey blocked their path obstinately and would not budge. The writer pelted a small pebble which the donkey hardly felt since he was so used to being beaten. Bobo was furious and said that Vijay had hurt her in the process. Affirming that she would not drink water for the day,she wept and had to be placated.

Returning from Delhi by Train

Once it so happened, that she was returning from Delhi with her father by train. Some young men shared the compartment and bragged about tales of their courage.This event occurred after India's independence when people fumed with indignation against the British Rule and insurgency surfaced off and on.

She listened and when they calmed down, managed to make them her own with logical reasoning. These  unruly elements were indeed ashamed of their deeds.

Meanwhile they arrived at Ambala Station and revered Bobo got ready to get down. 

One of the young men offered her a dagger and resolved," Bahen it is a matter of great pride to have great personalities of the likes of you in our nation. We will never err from today onwards. Kindly accept our token which you will probably need sometime."

Presented a Dagger

Seeing the weapon, she explained," Bhaiya I am never going to use this. One should be such a powerful upholder of non-violence that people are influenced; voicing your opinion comes much later."

" You must accept it as a symbol of the turning point in your brothers' lives., The youth insisted,

People saw the dagger safely stashed with her later on. The question of bringing it into use did not arise.

Deliverance of a Horse's Soul

A Tonga

The matter dates back to around 1975. Revered Bobo was returning from Krishna Nagar in a tonga. Sushila Bahen ji, Darshan and Vijay accompanied her. When the carriage drove a bit further than Birla Mandir, the horse's soul earnestly entreated her for its salvation.The tonga rider drove in joyous abandon with the horse's soul facing Ushaji alongside.Bobo was moved by loving compassion. Everyone got down and headed home on reaching Vrindavan. Bobo sent Vijay to find out about the black horse's condition.

The Robust Horse Attained Deliverance

They had come to know earlier that the tonga belonged to Mathura. The robust horse was well nourished and the spirited driver was a denizen of Braj.The very next day when Vijay inquired, its driver revealed that the horse was very costly and the owner would religiously attend to his needs. Not having the slightest inkling of how the sturdy horse gave up its life with no earlier illness, they were in a state of shock and its owner was deeply grieved.

When Vijay narrated this scene to Bobo she revealed the entire incident to Sushila Bahen ji, Darshan and Uma.

Revered Usha Bahen ji Meets Sushila Bahen ji (Usha Bahenji's Birth Anniversary: 30th July, 2026)

Revered Usha Bahenji (left) Meets Sushila Bahenji

People with similar perspectives, mindsets, bhavas and devotion for one's favoured deity invariably gather together. Relishing madhur rasa,the collective identity of the gopis serves as an element in their devotional strength and love for Krishna is reciprocated and thus made complete. The coming together of revered Usha Bahenji and Sushila Bahenji was based on the similarity of their bhavas, love flowing towards the Lord.

Post & Telegraph Service

Sushila ji's father left Lahore as 1946 set in and willingly joined the post and telegraph service in Ambala. He began staying at his brother's house with his two daughters. Sushila Bahen ji took her younger sister Nirmala Sharma to the Sanatan Dharm Girls School for admission to the first class. On the other hand the lawyer's daughter, at whose bhavan Pandit Jai Narayan stayed on, took Sushlilaji to make friends with Usha Bahenji.

The Indian National Congress

The protagonist of our biography was president of the Congress. She asked the lawyer's daughter to get Sushila Bahen ji to the Party's meeting. All members were present next day and Sushila ji also came. Several discussions ensued on patriotism, politics and spiritual topics. Usha ji's sweet voice, lovable and impressive persona moved Sushila ji. A mere introduction turned into serious friendship but Sushila ji could not be particularly influenced by Usha ji's political life.

There was a scarcity of teachers in the Girls School at this end. Sushila ji was convinced by the Sanatan Dharmis to join as a school teacher and Usha ji took charge of the school again when they requested her father. Both the friends worked as colleagues now. Their friendship became so intimate that the absence of one made the other uneasy. They met in school and later for satsang and worshipping the deity in the temple.

Shri Radha-Krishna with Sakhis

Always eager to catch up with each other, their discussions were soon confined to spirituality. Dark-hued Krishna, His leelas or divine play,  beloved Shri Radha, and the gopis, Her kayavyuhas or replications, became the centre of their talk. They appeared as two distinct individuals but were in essence a singly entity.

Once Sushila could not attend a Congress meeting. The next day when Usha ji asked the reason for her absence Sushila hesitantly showed greater interest in the sermon on Vaisakh at the temple. Bahen ji was certain that religion had more weightage than politics. Now their kinship became more intense and transformed into satsang because of spirituality.

Visualising Krishna as the World Around Them

They often met, discussed shringara bhakti (a certain spirituality that can arise by indulging in love) and the Lord's divine play. Krishna existed intensely in their hearts when they sang His praises and dwelt in their longing for Him. They began to know their friend not as a separate singular god-like body but mystically visualized Him as the world around them.

Kandhla Station

At the other end Pandit Jai Narayan had taken deeksha from Shri Purnanand ji Giri. A desire to live as a renunciate, tugged him intermittently. Consequently he resigned and the entire family had to shift to Kandhla, their ancestral village. Sushila Bahen ji was to give an examination and both the like-minded friends got a chance to live together. Enraptured by Lord Krishna, their nights transformed into dawn but they constantly relished His rasa.

Work pressure increased for Usha Bahen ji. Creating poetry was her innate virtue and it was her disposition to talk of God's glories. She had to work for the Congress due to love for her nation and run the school simultaneously . Alongside, she was steeped in spirituality and passionate assurances of Krishna.

After giving the examination, Sushila Bahen ji had to shift to Kandhla (Muzzafarnagar). Soon after, their conversation on the divine play of Krishna transformed into correspondence. A letter was penned every day to be posted and a reply was sent from the other end.

Sushila Bahen ji and her family came to live with an uncle in Delhi for some reason. Her love for the dark-hued god gradually escalated and singing Krishna's glories was at its zenith. An ardent longing to relish the joy of His presence tugged Sushila ji and she wanted to run to Him.

One morning in October 1950 there was absolute silence in the house located on Baird Road, Delhi. Scouting around, asking relatives, a vigilant search was on for Sushila Bahen ji. She was nowhere to be found and they even inquired at Usha Bahen ji's residence in Ambala.

Shri Radha Madan Mohan Temple, Vrindavan

Hungry for Krishna Sushila ji had fled to Vrindavan, to hear the dark god fluting in its blossoming pastures. She knew nobody except Shyam, the colour of the condensed sky and spent the night in a field in front of the Madan Mohan Temple located on the banks of the Yamuna. In joyous abandon she braved the biting cold without any woolens on her.

Mathura

While having darshan of Bihariji she met a family of Bengal and they took her along. Moved by her loving tenderness, they were instrumental in getting Bahen ji a ticket for Delhi. Spending some days in Vrindavan and Mathura, Sushila ji returned to Delhi. The religious rapture she experienced on coming close to Radha-Krishna, lent a certain stability.

Straight away she went to Usha Bahen ji. Everyone was thrilled on getting news of her arrival. 

"Don't toss your heart in the street," Usha Bahen ji felt that love for Krishna,the focus of  their ardour, should not be flaunted

She considered Shri Thakurji, whose seva she did, to be a svarupa, the living presence, of Lord Krishna. 

"Cant you clearly see Krishna in Him?" she asked Sushila ji as she pointed towards Thakurji.

Even on seeing her religious devotion it was tough to ascertain the access revered Usha ji had to the most intimate transcendental exchanges of Radha-Krishna. She had close contact with the greatest of saints but remained an enigma, being secretive about her sentiments and due to her austere simplicity.

",My beloved Krishna, you took her along. What greater good fortune could she have! And there is no point being jealous of this fact,"apparently Usha Bahenj i did not support this act of Sushila ji but truly respected her sentiment

We can figure out her intense closeness to Krishna by Sushila Bahen ji's comprehensive compilations of Ushaji's experiences. Once this diary fell into Usha ji's hands and she added a word or two as correction to make the writings easily understandable. Otherwise she was so averse to publicity and propaganda that no one truly understood her as long as she lived.

Shri Radha-Krishna were Visible in Usha Bahenji's Yugal Sarkar

What was the need to flee in this manner?"Usha ji remarked on confronting her.

For the very first time, Sushilaj i felt that Krishna,the Supreme Lover, she had been hungering and ardently longing for was visible in the svarupa of Thakurji whose seva she did. Surely, He invaded her heart with His passionate eyes, melodious flute-play, romantic smile and loving assurances. Steeped in the terrifying rush of Krishna's love, He was easily attainable for her now.

Her father came to fetch Sushila ji in Ambala. She went to Delhi and further on to Kandhla once again to live with her parents, absorbed in the same bhava.

Lord Krishna, Supreme Lover of the Love Struck Soul

Steadily, seriousness set in and stability suffused Sushila Bahen ji's religious sentiments. She became introspective and experienced the deeper ecstasies of devotion. The learned liken this blissful state to an unchanted japa, the upholders of justice and Vedantas call it the eternal Brahma Jyoti and yet the realm of lovers (Krishna is conceptualized as the ardent but often faithless lover of the love-struck soul) is strange.

Dark-hued Krishna Resides in Our Heart

Krishna alone produces from Himself the spectral revelation wherein worshippers come to find the god within themselves. Thus the ultimate lesson of Krishna for His devotees is that the search for the other is the search for the self. The multiple is ultimately one. And yet this search for purity and peace cannot be made except with energy, and joyfulness and love.

Revered Usha Bahen ji and Shri Sushila Bahen ji shared a lifelong association and we will narrate its episodes from time to time.

Chapter 12: Principal Usha ji Comes into Contact with Saints ( Usha Bahenji's Birth Anniversary: 30th July,2026)

After education, acquiring knowledge, getting fame, contacting the best of people and becoming powerful in the mundane world, life is futile unless steeped in the love of Radha-Krishna.

The Eternal Quest of Mankind for Divine Love

The perennial quest of mankind is to be one with God. When we make the slightest effort to attain Radha,the divine feminine energy (shakti) and Krishna, the divine energetic source (shaktiman) they readily support us. There is instant peace and we easily obtain the company of saints willing to give us their blessings.

Revered Usha Bahenji Acquires Fame at a Young Age

Revered Bahen ji had acquired great fame at a young age and had immense respect for Indian literature.She had imbibed tales of the Shastras-Puranas abounding with knowledge and renunciation even before being born.

Yearning for Krishna, the Dark-hued Cowherd of Vrindavan

Apart from this Usha ji had a keen interest in poetry, and an inimitable principled manner of delivering her ideas. Alongside she ardently longed for the divine and was passionately drawn to Radha-Krishna. If devotees representing souls in search of salvation are hungry for the fulfillment of love, that beautiful dark-skinned cowherd of Vrindavan is hungry too.The very foundation of a religion of union is that the individual partial and manifest self must ultimately be joined with the universal, whole and un-manifest Self.

Her association with the Sanatan Dharmis was constant. Bahen ji was principal of the Sanatan Dharam Girls School. She had a particular interest in spirituality, profound knowledge of the Shastras-Puranas, and clear perspectives of the Bhagvad Gita. Great luminaries visiting Ambala were invariably impressed by this short-statured lady's teasing, spirited, speedy and mature opinion of the scriptures.

Handsome Krishna seeing His love-struck devotees gives support accordingly so that they move in delicious anguish to His side.

Ambala

This time several mahatmas, learned socialites and speakers were invited to the yearly sammelan of the Sanatan Dharam Sabha. Highly revered Udiya Baba, Shri Hari Baba, Shri Anandamayi Maa, Shri Gangeshv aranandji an expert at the Vedas, Shri Prabhudatt Brahmachari, Shri Swami Ganesh Dutt ji, Shri Binduji Maharaj and Shri Mukund Hariji Maharaj were all present, adding to the Sabha's pride.

Representing Ambala's Sanatan Dharam Sabha, Ushaji welcomed the array of guests. Doctrines were examined and she got a chance of personally talking with them on several religious issues.They were all impressed on hearing the unprecedented views of wide-eyed Bahen ji simply attired, attending to their needs, and managing the scene unpretentiously with a placid mind and loving tenderness.

Revered Bobo's self-effacing persona, a focused bhava of serving Thakurji, selfless reverence for Shri Mahaprabhu, adoration of Vrindavan, attraction for Braj and perspectives on many scriptures enraptured everyone present. Her in-depth review of the Gita was unheard of. This brilliant combination made her strike a close rapport with the saints and receive their blessings.

 Shri Udiya Baba

Shri Purnananda Tirtha ji Maharaj

A chance of sighting Udiya Baba's Annapurna Siddhi (goddess of agriculture and incarnation of Durga;siddhi acquisition of supernatural powers by worship of a deity) presented itself in Ambala. Foodstuffs had been arranged in plenty but they seemed not sufficent for the thronging newcomers.

A request was made to Shri Udiya Baba. He asked all the ingredients to be covered with a cloth and to be served after some time without removing the cover. The prasad was distributed with a generous hand but still there was enough leftover. Bahen ji narrated this incident she had seen in person. Baba had implicit faith in Brahma, the all pervading spirit of the universe, and was most accomplished in religious devotion.

Shri Hari Baba

Shri Hari Babaji

Usha ji had the good fortune to have darshan of Shri Hari Baba ji Maharaj several times in Ambala. Even after coming to Vrindavan she would often go to have a glimpse of Maharaj ji.

The main attraction which drew everyone to Hari Baba was the bhakti bhava of Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and the propagation of sankirtan. 

Impressed by his strict discipline of self-denial and conscientious observance of sankalp she had once raved, "He was a such a great devotee that the earth was blessed, the era was honoured and followers were enlightened by his calibre. Several festivals of Vrindavan were graced by his presence."

Shri Ananadamayi Maa

Shri Anandamayi Maa

Which devotee having serious interest in spirituality would be unacquainted with revered Maa's commendable lifestyle. Her character and persona are stotras of inspiration for ascetics.

Pujya Maa had also come along with Udiya Baba and Hari Baba. As of now Maa's loving nature and closeness had steeped followers in a different charm. On seeing a young boy absorbed in the joyous abandon of Maa, Bobo smiled at his spirited antics. When he asked her name she teasingly said that it was Krodhamayi ( one overpowered by anger). Maa came, strolling along. 

 Delightfully the boy shouted from a distance,"Maa, Maa! You are Anandamayi (blissful and joyous) and she is Krodhamayi." 

Maa stopped and looked at Bahen ji with great affection and smiled. Bobo had said that the sense of affinity and oneness she had experienced in that gaze was not possible in this mundane world.

At this end a few years before her death she got a message from Maa. During the span of her illness Santosh Bahen  ji, Dharam Bahen ji, Sushila Bahen ji and some others went for darshan to Anandamayi Maa's Vrindavan Ashram. All of them were overwhelmed by her closeness and affection.

Swami Gangeshwaranand

Shri Gangeshwaranand ji Maharaj

Highly revered Shri Maharaj had come along other saints to the yearly gathering of the Sanatan Dharam Sabha at Ambala. Inspite of being blind, his field of learning and knowledge of the Vedas was unparalleled.Discussing Indian literature with Bahen ji, he was pleased. Apart from this occasion he had come to Ambala many times and had personal contact with her. He always exulted about Bobo's noble modesty and simplicity, being impressed by her religious devotion, belief and tenderness.

Later on knowing that she had left Ambala and come to stay permanently in Vrindavan he began praising her immensely. 

With maternal fondness he rema," Usha what can I say about you! Everything was the same for you there also but the fact that you have come to Vrindavan is a matter of great joy."

Goswami Shri Bindu ji Maharaj

Goswami Shri Binduji Maharaj

Goswami ji's style of reciting the Ramayana has always been praiseworthy. He would often visit Ambala. Revered Bobo was considered an authority on the Ramcharitmanas. She almost knew the entire 'Ramayana', the poetic classic written by Tulsidas, by heart.

Shri Bindu ji Maharaj was invaribaly impressed by her sharp intellect and mature perspective. He said that it was virtually impossible to live a lifestyle of such austerity. 

'Shri Chaitanya Charitavali'

Shri Prabhudatt ji Brahmachari

On reading the sacred text 'Chaitanya-Charitavali' Bobo's was full of gratitude towards Shri Prabhudatt ji Brahmachari. She felt that this picturesque life sketch of Chaitanya Mahaprabhu had created an inspiring history for the world of devotees. On his coming to Ambala, she went to pay homage and greet him.

The subject expounded in the book, the use of language and appraising of bhavas are certainly the text's assets. The gushing of rasa is inevitable when the mind and perspectives are in tandem.

In Vrindavan also she went along with Sushila Bahen ji, Darshan Bahen ji, Uma Bahen ji to his ashram for darshan with Vijay accompanying them. He recognised her and met them with great warmth.  Highly pleased to know that she had come to Vrindavan permanently, he blessed her by coming home once or twice later on.

Dinanath Dinesh ji's translation of the padas of Shri Bhagvad Gita in pure Hindi was very admirable.Because of Bobo's powerful recitation of the Gita several people would come to study from her. Dinesh ji would praise her authoritative opinion and had great affection fro her.

Shri Mukundhari ji Maharaj's style of sankirtan was very impressive. Everyone would rave about his onomatopoeic quality  when he recited the Shri Radha Krishna Kripa Kataksha Stotras.