Same Bhavas Outside and Within
Bobo's Yugal or Radha-Krishna
The one who were very dear to her, the energy of her life, the supreme lover, who made her savour his closeness by showering compassionate grace, whom she would constantly meditate upon and never trust with anyone for a second, that beautiful yugal Radha-Krishna, were visible in the same manner outwardly and within. Their svarupa made her savour their divine play in her siddh svarupa (perfected or sanctified by penance) as of today. Her mind became more detached to other modes of life and the zenith of devotion was evident.
Shri Yamuna in Vrindavan
Similar feelings regarding a dip in Shri Yamuna also surfaced.Steeping her in the rasa or bliss of its sweetly passionate waves apparently, Shri Yamuna began to absorb her in the same rasa at home by granting its closeness. Being sick in her youth Bobo had attained the joy of joining together with Priya-Priyatam seated below the kadamba tree in Govind Ghat with her spiritual body (whereas this worldly body made up of five elements lay ill in Ambala).Her mind had become stable with an ardent longing to reside in the same place.
The sequence of dawn and evening were changing with the passage of each day.The bitter cold was rising steadily and Bobo's body became increasingly frail.Despite this Bobo's spiritual strength, spiritual awareness and the great perception of Shyama-Shyam plus their divine play escalated. Her divine sentiments were becoming perceptible and the lustre of her body radiated as she was teary- eyed.
The beauteous forms and playful dalliance of Shyama-Shyam spilled over as love and she exulted, “This shrine like nikunja has a unique radiance today comprising of a secret magical world removed from the everyday. Relishing the same Shri of the realm of love are the youthful handsome Shyam and the enraptured Shri Radha, as they organise the amorous frolics of shringara rasa, and a new rush of love flows from their laughter.”
Well Bobo was withdrawing and winding up outwardly.Shri Sushila Bahenji, the confidante of Bobo, saw a scene on the night of 18th January 1992 while awake. Presenting the episode as it is, I would term it a string in the final conjuncture of Bobo's perspective and her identity.
The Spiritual Form of Revered Bobo
“I saw with eyes open at around half past twelve at night, her sick body was lying down at the Radha Vallabha Site but her divine body of an adolescent young girl, decked in divine attire, absolutely healthy with a beautiful sturdy physique and radiant bodily lustre was wide-eyed. Enchanted she sat oblivious of her surroundings and gazed fixedly.Her posture was charming and the site appeared celestial with the beauty of nature strewn all around. It was difficult to say where her sight was fastened but it was crystal clear that the young maiden was revered Bobo.
Revered Bobo and Sushila Bahenji
Near her another sakhi sat at the back and seemed like a shadow. Initially I assumed the sakhi was me but on Kamda's* leaving her body later along with Bobo it was confirmed that the fortunate one was Kamda.Her abandoning the body in this manner was most unusual as she followed her.”
*Shri Kamda Bahen used to study from Bobo and was attached to her.She had dedicated devotion for the feet of Shyama-Shyam.Soon after she got news of Bobo passing away on 20th February 1992 at 7:00 pm., Kamda Bahen lost her calm but some divine force gave her hope in Jind where she was residing.On 21st February just before consigning Bobo to the waters of Yamuna Kamdaji reached Kesi Ghat but the boat with Bobo's body had already left for Vanshi Ghat.On reaching at 12 in the afternoon Kamda begged, “Bobo! Take me along, Bobo take me along.” She got down from another boat arranged for her and collapsed.Standers by poured water in her mouth and she also departed along with revered Bobo for the divine dham (where the god forever dwells). Kamda Bahen was consigned to the flames on 22nd February at 9 o' clock in the morning.The only unprecedented incident of taking another sakhi along with her which had occurred after Mahaprabhuji and Svarupa Damodara was probably this one.
Another rare incident of Bobo's mental state was linked to this scene. The ill health of her body and the cheerfulness of her mind were absolutely different. At one end her mundane body appeared ailing while Sushila Bahenji could sight her divine form and ecstatic state. Steeped in the sweet divine play of Shayma-Shyam, the perception of Bobo became lucid and spilled over.
“Passionately drawing the mind with their slow gait, smiling Shyam-Shyam were engrossed in some love talk as they came close to their intimate sakhi.Enthused, she was delighted to relish the sweetness of their forms.The following lines were written and published for all of us as her last perception,
Priya-larhile Shyam ghan,
Laal larhaaitee baal |
Hanste-hanste aavat chale,
Mand manohar chaal ||
Shri Sushila Bahenji had already got the premonition of Bobo checking out from this material world and entering the Absolute with her nitya siddh body(eternally purified and sanctified by penance).She wanted to reveal this perception to Bobo to check if it was true but the thought of separation from her most dear one was unbearable. A week passed by in this dilemma.
All the close acquaintances came running, eager to know about her health. Shrimati Praveen Narang came from Bikaner, while Indu Bahen dropped in from Durgapur,Bahen Abha from Gwalior,Bahen Utma from Hisar and Bahen Uma from Delhi flocked to Bobo. Manoj and Neelu also arrived and other associates streamed in. Seeing her in person was certainly a relief but they had to go back.
Shri Manohar Dasji
All of them were persisting for a medical examination.Revered Manohar Dasji had been insistent many a time.During this span Shyam Bhai Saheb came from Ambala to meet Bobo. Meanwhile Urmil Rajeshwari, Shanno Gupta, Nirmal Gupta, Vimla Sharma and several other bahens also arrived, and were adamant. Dr.Saxena a homoeopath would often drop in to ask about her state and consultation.
Shri Lalit Bahenji
Highly revered Shri Lalit Bahenji had been firm that Bobo have a diagnosis and proper treatment done. On everyone's constant entreaty when Bahenji found Bobo's stubbornness to be somewhat lax she took on the entire burden of hospitalisation. How can I lessen her dignity by applauding the effort she put in? Actually speaking her affection for Bobo was deep-seated and she anxiously longed to see her hale and hearty.
She would drop in every day for certain and many a time come again in the evening,warning us to be cautious. I recall those lines spoken with fond affection, “Children! Be careful so as not to lose this priceless treasure or else all of us will be looted.”Probably some sentences of revered Bobo were making Shri Lalitji apprehensive of the future.
25th January 1992 was fixed as the day when Bobo would be taken to hospital for a medical examination. It seems that she had completely withdrawn herself mentally on that fateful day. Before this she had never agreed to go to hospital and get a diagnosis done.Consenting in this manner contrary to her nature was another indication of her getting ready for entry into the nikunja lila (where the god forever dwells).